I'm sorry to hear that. Every situation is different. If I were in your shoes I'd try to be open about it with recruiters and figure out / propose some alternative that work better for you - whatever that might be. Also keeping good portfolio of Open Source projects, blogposts etc. might help convince potential employers that you're worth considering and that your 'condition' (for a lack of a better word) is real and does not affect your work performance. Keeping good reputation and connections (which you already mentioned) is also very important.
From my experience companies are very flexible and open minded - mostly they care about just not hiring someone that they will have to fire later.
No need for sorrow. Everyone is dealt some advantages and some disadvantages. We work with what we have. I seem to have done all right. My resume is long and I have good stories to tell. I can't complain.
I was responding to another poster who said that "If devs can't muster up the courage to answer interview questions... maybe that means that they should work on themselves a little bit?"
I mean, maybe. Maybe sometimes. Then again, maybe not.
Maybe "working on themselves a little" isn't necessarily the answer. There isn't a known way to "work on myself" to affect my trait neuroticism in any significant way, for example.
Maybe it's not necessarily about "courage". I mean, courage is doing something that frightens you because it needs to be done. I know what that's like. Technical interviews don't even rate. But that doesn't solve the brainteaser on the whiteboard when a stranger's watching me.
In general - working on yourself is usually somewhat possible. For many people public speaking etc. is something they have to practice and they do eventually learn. In some situations though it might not be. All individual cases are different.
So I wouldn't be too hard on myself, but also I wouldn't give up. From what I read, you might have already tried, so oh well, maybe you're just stuck with it.
I like "We work with what we have". That's something I deeply agree with.
From my experience companies are very flexible and open minded - mostly they care about just not hiring someone that they will have to fire later.